The Misleading Nature of the Phrase: Herbal Refreshment

The Author: I have a feeling of guilt.
Answer Man: How come?
The Author: Forget about that for now. Listen to this. . . (whistles “Dixie”)
Answer Man: Jeepers!
The Author [still attempting the whistle]. . .
Answer Man: Are you in fact [whistle stops] guilty?
The Author: Your timing is slightly off [pause for effect], but I still respect you as I respect all of my characters.
Answer Man: I no more belong to you than your imagined [he utters a heavy sigh] guilt.
The Author: Are you sad now? I am trying to understand YOUR emotions.
Answer Man: Not quite. But either way there are foods to experiment with, I am sure of it. For example. Guilt is not a pizza so much as guilt is a shallow dish of pimento cheese spread.
The Author: Somehow I KNEW that you would say those words then. But I so dislike pimento cheese. Perhaps—[he is interrupted, as we often are in conversations]
Answer Man: OK OK, bear with me here. The guilt is not the cheese spread, nor is it the pimentos, nor is it the salty taste it gives you at the back of your throat, nor is it the shallow dish in which it waits for crackers or bunny bread with the crust cut off. The guilt is the combination of these elements. Your experience of guilt can never be detached from the circumstances of the picnic.
The Author: What picnic? [incredulously, confused severely, but with a strong will to learn from his mistakes].
Answer Man: The picnic during which you propose marriage to your beloved over pimento cheese sandwich quarters. She rejects you of course [rudely interrupted, he does not take it well. He never does. This is not OK].
Voice of the Beloved: [booming] I WHAT??? {to be continued…)